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Relationships

AITAH for breaking up with my girlfriend over cheese?

For some backstory I (24F) have been dating my girlfriend (23F) for a little over a year. We’ve been living together for 5 months. I would say we are an average couple, happy most times but we argue here and there. The main reason why we argue is because she has a streak of acting very entitled and spoiled at times. She will do things I specifically ask her not to do, and if I get upset she will cry and make excuses for herself and only apologize if she feels like I’m “ignoring her” (i.e. when I am too exhausted to keep entertaining her). She will eat my leftovers, leave the apartment a mess (it’s my apartment), invite people over and let them leave the apartment a mess, etc. This has been happening at least once a week since we moved in together. Yesterday, there was a holiday market about 2 hours away. She had sent me a post about it about a week ago and kept talking about how she wanted to go, so I rented an airbnb for the weekend for the both of us to go together. We ended up getting into an argument day of because shes never had to stay in an airbnb before and convinced herself that the hosts were going to spy on us or kidnap us or kill us or something. She got upset that I didn’t get a hotel even though every hotel in the area is so damn expensive and I’m the only one with a job right now. I told her I was just gonna go by myself if she’s going to make such a big deal over nothing, and her exact words were “fuck you and your farmers market, don’t get me shit”. So I go to the market, had fun by myself, and got this very expensive imported European cheese. Mind you, this cheese was $40 for a pound, and I’m sure it would cost more having to buy it online because I know they don’t sell this anywhere around here. I planned to make a meal with this cheese for me and her because I like to cook. I came back this morning and told her exactly, “Do not eat the cheese in the refrigerator. It was expensive and I’m going to use it later, and you also said don’t get you anything so it’s not for you.” She said okay, and I went to work. She texts me at work and says “promise not to be mad” and I immediately knew. She ate my cheese. What I did not expect was for her to eat the entire pound of cheese. I was gone for 6 hours????? And the entire pound is gone????? I didn’t text her back but when I got home I told her right away to pack her shit up and leave because I can’t deal with her bs anymore. She started crying about how “it’s just cheese” and that I’m “getting mad over nothing” but I told her to leave before I call the police. She left in tears and is staying with her parents, who are texting me calling me an asshole for breaking up with her and kicking her out over cheese. I think the issue is bigger than the cheese at this point, but maybe I overreacted I don’t know. Am I the asshole?

2026-01-20 21:09:08

Luca Moretti

Current Events

AITAH for breaking my lease?

So I signed a lease for a place in NYC a while back, and things were going fine. Recently, though, management decided to "upgrade" the elevators. Now you have to scan your keycard every time you use them, and here’s the kicker—you’re limited to three rides a day. If you go over, you get a warning for “excessive elevator use.” And you can be fined. Seriously. In a high-rise. In NYC. Here’s the thing: I came into some money recently (got super lucky) and decided to buy my own place. I figured, why stick around with all these restrictions? So, I gave notice, and now my roommates and the management are flipping out. They’re saying it’s selfish and irresponsible, especially because it’s so last minute. But like, I don’t see why I should stay and deal with these ridiculous rules. Three elevator rides a day? No thanks. I get that it’s probably a hassle for them, finding a new roommate or dealing with the vacancy, but this elevator stuff is absurd. If they’re gonna throw all these weird restrictions at us, I feel like I’m within my rights to peace out. I’d rather deal with the costs of breaking my lease than put up with that nonsense. But yeah, now everyone’s acting like I’m the bad guy here.

2026-01-20 21:09:07

Jonas Bergström

AITA

AITA for telling the bride’s stepmom she can’t steal wine from behind the bar?

I’m a bartender who works wedding events on weekends for extra income. Over the weekend, I worked a wedding event and the cocktail hour had just started (5pm). During cocktail hour, we only had the lounge bar and rooftop bar open. The main bar was closed but was going to open when dinner was served later on. Anyways…. I had to do some dishes behind the main bar and noticed a lady on the other side of the bar, reach over the bar top and grab a bottle of wine from our ice bucket. At first I thought maybe she just wanted to look at the label, but then she proceeded to twist off the cap and help herself. I said “Ma’am, you cannot do that. Please ask a bartender to serve you at one of the open bars” her response was “well I just wanted some wine” and I said “that’s against our policy, you can’t just take alcohol from behind a bar.” I processed to take the wine bottle back and fill her glass. And THEN she pulled the whole “well I am the step mom of the bride” which I responded with “well then you should certainly know better then.” AND THEN she had the audacity to stay “well you don’t have to be a bitch about it”. I was so surprised and was shaking with adrenaline after the whole interaction. I just said “OK” and left the bar. I vented to another coworker which they told management and they all checked on me and made sure I was okay. They also confronted the lady and said she is no longer to help herself to our alcohol and to only go through a bartender and that they had been having issues from the same lady the whole day. Am I the asshole for saying something and stopping her?

2026-01-20 21:09:05

Elise Dubois

AITA

AITA for not letting my friend borrow my car after she stranded me the week before?

I (18F+) have a small, close friend group, and we usually have each other's backs. We take turns driving places, splitting gas, that kind of thing. I’ve let a few of them use my car before (with me in it or not), and it’s never been a big deal—until now. Last weekend, one friend offered to drive us all to a concert about 45 minutes away. I left my car at her place, and we all piled into hers. The plan was to hang out afterward, then ride back together. But near the end of the night, she met some guy and decided to ditch—literally just left with him without telling us. I only found out when she texted, “Hey, I’m crashing at his place, you’ll have to find another ride.” We were stuck. One of our friends had to call her older brother to come pick us up, and I had to Uber back to her place the next morning to get my car. It was super inconvenient, and honestly? Kind of disrespectful. Fast forward to this past weekend—she texted me asking to borrow my car because hers was “acting up” and she had a date. I said no. She got super passive-aggressive about it, saying I was being petty and holding a grudge over “one mistake.” Some people in our group are split. A couple agree she shouldn’t have left us like that in the first place, but another said I was being spiteful and should have just helped her out. So… AITA for not letting her borrow my car after she stranded me?

2026-01-20 21:08:56

Elise Dubois

AITA

AITAH for carelessly letting our daughter overhear a conversation

A private conversation between my wife and me was overheard by our teen daughter this morning, and I’m not sure what to do next. After returning from the gym, in the garage after getting out of the car, my wife mentioned that she was feeling better (she had been ill this week), and that we should make time for sex later. She said “if I’m not up to it, I’ll help you out at least.” I said that her timing was great because seeing her in her swimsuit at the gym gave me a huge urge to go down on her, if she’s up for that. She gave me a smile and raised her eyebrows, but then… …she realized our teen daughter was standing behind me. She had heard it all - she was in the garage and we didn’t realize it. I pretended (or hoped) she hadn’t heard anything, but my wife says she clearly did. I don’t know if we should talk to our daughter about what she heard, or just leave it alone. Ugh. AITAH for being careless?

2026-01-20 21:08:55

Luca Moretti

Family

AITA: I asked my ex-husbands mother to stay away from my children

A little back story: my ex husband and I were together for 8 years. My two sons were ultimately adopted by him. He has two daughters that I fell in love with and we were a good family. His ex wife hated me, which I understood due to her daughter's wanting me over her, though I engaged them to be with her, even when she wasnt around for various reasons. My ex-husbands mother hates me because when we first got together, I made him be his own person and not rely on her. He would literally go over there and have her do his laundry and watch his kids while he did nothing. Again, I understood why she hate me and continued on with our relationship. Well, we split up, and now his mother and ex wife are best friends and when she is around my children, she continues to bash me in front of them. I got a call from my step daughter a couple weeks ago crying that she cant handle what "meme" was saying. This was the last straw for me. Apparently she told my 13 year old son who has a rare tumor disorder and experiences pain, that im lying to him and everyone about his diagnosis and treatment, and that I shouldn't be allowed to have contact with my own children. I attempted to talk with her to understand the situation and put boundaries down. She replied by saying I lie about everything and she doesnt care what I have to say. I told her I wouldn't allow my children to be subjected to her type of abuse, and she said that because my ex husband is their dad and pays child support, she can essentially see and do whatever she wants. Ive dealt with her for 10 years in total now and this is the first time ive put my foot down because she actually made two of my children cry due to what shes said. I feel terrible because she is "family", but my children and I have been through a lot and I dont feel like they deserve to be subjected to that. What should I do if he does allow her to see them if I've asked him not to?

2026-01-20 21:08:52

Luca Moretti

AITA

AITA for snapping at my tutor because I was late to work?

I, (15M), attend a private school on scholarship and have really struggled with a lot of things throughout my time there - socially and academically - as it's been difficult to balance keeping my GPA above the threshold and working to help my sister pay rent. I've always struggled with math, and ever since I've started working more hours, my grade's been getting worse and I'm scared to lose my scholarship. I talked to my math teacher and learning specialist about this, and since I can't afford a tutor, they've decided it was a good idea to pair me up with another student in my class (15M). For simplicity, we'll call him Allen (fake name). Now, a couple of things you should know about me: Firstly, I'd say I'm quite good at English/related subjects (when I'm not rambling on Reddit), and second, I'm not exactly fond of Allen. Despite that, it's been quite a beneficial partnership for us both (we tutor each other in different subjects). My grades have been improving, and we've even started to develop a sort of friendship. However, here's the situation: Allen was tutoring me after school (not the ideal time, but I needed help for a test I had the day after), and we lost track of time. When I saw the time, I realized I was about to be late for work and stood up to leave. I was packing up quickly, so Allen asked why I was in such a rush, and I kind of froze. One thing about this school is that there aren't many scholarship kids like myself, and the students are pretty ruthless towards them (I've seen a lot of students get bullied because of it) - so I've tried to keep it hidden from anyone. Here's where I might be the asshole, though: I refused to give him an explanation and tried to run out, but he caught me by the wrist and asked again. At this point, I was pretty mad and told him to mind his own business. He still wouldn't let me go and said that he was 'just worried about me,' but I was really running late, so I snapped at him that it was none of his business to stop being worried because I was doing great and to leave me alone. I know he was just worried, but I really needed to go and forgot about it until the next day. The next day, I came to school, and one of our mutual friends, I'll call her Shelly (14F), came up to me and asked what the hell was wrong with me and called me an asshole for yelling at Allen when he just wanted to help. In my eyes, I was just trying to get where I was going, and he was being pushy (we're not very close friends), but now I'm not too sure. AITA?

2026-01-20 21:08:43

Anya Petrova

Relationships

AITAH for ghosting my ex fiancé’s dad after she said no and left me at the alter?

I 21m was orphaned around 6 years ago in March of 2019 after a horrific car accident where my whole family was unlived. At that time, I was in a two-month relationship with my now ex-fiancée, and she stood with me more than anyone else did. Her whole family took me in as one of their own, especially her father. He treated me just as he did his two sons, if not even better, and I love him and still love him as a dad. I have been working with him for over two years now because he’s a lawyer, and I’m studying law. To graduate, one must work in a law firm for experience, and usually, this work is unpaid. However, he pays me minimum wage, which is much more than he is required to, and I appreciate that greatly. Living alone for that long was lonely, even with a loving second family. I wanted marriage so she could move in and I would not be alone. When I proposed last year, she happily accepted, and her family was thrilled for both of us. Then, our supposed wedding came this past June. In front of our whole family and friends, she said no and ran outside crying. I just stood there feeling like it was a dream, but it was reality. She destroyed me that day. Her parents went after her as I stood there watching everyone whisper and look at me, and I just snapped. I went home, threw all her stuff away that was already there, and then went straight to the airport to go to our honeymoon alone because the trip was expensive, and most of it was non-refundable. I had already lost a lot of money on the failed marriage. Her family tried to contact me for the next two weeks, but I deactivated all my social media. Even after returning, I could not bring myself to see any of them, so I avoided work too. I live in a small village where everyone knows everything, and since that day, people have painted me as the evil bastard who forced this innocent little girl into marriage, but she heroically saved herself. This is all nonsense; I never even raised my voice at her. Life went on, and I found another lawyer for my internship. He was nowhere near as good as my ex-fiancée's dad, but it was not too bad. They stopped trying to reach out, and people stopped talking about the whole thing, making it feel like things were moving on. Then, about two weeks ago, I was relaxing at home alone at night when her dad came over. I welcomed him in and offered coffee, which he accepted. Before we could talk, he started apologizing for his daughter, saying she got cold feet at the last second and refused. He said he was not proud of her and was unhappy about the situation. I told him it was none of his fault and that I was sorry for ghosting him, but being around him was painful because she looks so much like him, even though I still love him. He asked if I would like to come back and work with him, even if I only wanted a professional relationship, because he loves me like a son and does not want to lose that. I told him I would think about it. Am I the asshole because of how I reacted, and should I return to work with him? Any help would be appreciated.

2026-01-20 21:08:42

Elise Dubois

Family

AITA for changing my name and not telling my father?

I (34 M) was named after my father. I have a sister that is 11 months older than me. My father walked out when I was only 6 months old. He popped up ever once in a while until he came to live with us, then he left again when my mom got sick and started raising someone else's children. He was a real parent to them despite being the "children are meant to be seen and not heard" type. My sister and I were included in things with the other kids at the request of my step-mother but it still felt like he wasn't my dad. I accepted the other children as extra siblings and they accepted me and my sister as well. My step-mother cared for us as her own when we visited and I love them all. My father ended up leaving again and getting with a different woman and still for years never made an attempt to mend things with me. He would call to tell me happy birthday but never on my birthday. I never corrected him either. I felt like I should've have to correct him because he was there when I was born. My sister was the one who reached out to him and has forgiven him and allows him to be in my niece and nephew's lives. I don't have kids yet but I don't want him around me or my family. I feel like he doesn't deserve it. In a recent conversation, he asked if I was gonna continue the carrying of our name. I laughed a bit and said "I don't know, maybe." On the inside I felt very uncomfortable about that question and brought it up to my wife. She feels the same way I do. She knows everything about my experiences with him and feels that he shouldn't have a chance to be a "good grandfather" to makeup for being a lousy father. He put me through so much as a kid and as much as I wanted him to go away, my mom wanted us to know him and allow him to be apart of our lives. She didn't know about any of what he did until I told her when I was 27. She asked why I didn't like talking to him and I told her everything that happened while she was at the doctor and dialysis. She was mortified and called him and yelled at him for an hour. He just told her that if she wanted him to parent us a certain way she should have said so. I thought a lot about what he asked and I came to the conclusion that I didn't want to continue the name. I didn't want to pass onto my son the burden that is my father. I, also, didn't want the name myself. So, I went and got it changed and never planned on telling my father. When I brought it up to my sister, she got mad and started laying into to me. Yelling and asking how could I be so selfish and how it would make our father feel when he finds out. I yelled back at her, asking if she remembered what he had put us through as kids. After getting off the phone with her, I thought about what she said. Now I feel like I've made a mistake. So, AITA for changing my name and not telling my father?

2026-01-20 21:08:37

Elise Dubois

Movie Reviews

AITAH for celebrating that someone got deported finally?

My stepsiblings' father has been under a final deportation order for years, and he finally *finally* got deported recently. I was at my dad's house and his wife told me, and I was thrilled. I told her congratulations, and she was really happy about it too. I mentioned the situation to a friend of mine and he said "dude, that is so fucked up. How can you be happy that someone got deported?" I explained to my friend that this guy is a huge POS that treated my stepsister like garbage and was always harassing my step brother for being too westernized. He was awful to his ex and kids, and he was supposed to be deported years ago anyway. My friend says deportation is cruel and amoral, and that it's never okay to celebrate it. Even if a person is a bad person they don't deserve to be deported. If he's as bad as I say he should be in jail, not sent to a dangerous country. I don't think that's fair. He never had permission to live here in the first place, it just took a long time to remove him. His own biological kids are happy about it. Am I seriously an asshole for this?

2026-01-20 21:08:30

Clara Jensen

Current Events

AITAH for response to parking lot incident at daycare?

Wife is 9 month pregnant and loading our 2 year old into car seat while in daycare parking lot. Another car, driven by either another parent or nanny, despite seeing my wife decides she can’t wait 20 seconds and attempts to pull her car out from the spot. Well, her car makes contact with my wife’s car and physically pushes the door in on my wife. Fortunately she was fine as she was halfway inside the car so the contact didn’t press her between anything really. The driver stops for a second and as per my wife clearly knows she hit her car because some eye contact was made, but then quickly speeds off without apologizing or doing anything else. My wife was completely distraught. We told the daycare and are waiting to see what will happen. There are cameras and I’d want to see the footage. This whole thing is exasperated due to my wife being pregnant, it happening in the daycare parking lot, and the fact that the other woman didn’t even apologize whatsoever. So my response was… call the police station and get their opinion… and they said a hit-and-run could be filed. We did just that. We filed a report. When asked if we’d want criminal charges… I insisted my wife say yes, because F this lady. Now though I’m starting to wonder if I should feel bad… nobody was injured but you know… 9 months pregnant and it could’ve been different had she been standing in a different spot between the cars.

2026-01-20 21:08:29

Anya Petrova

Family

AITA for refusing to let my sister’s toxic friend stay with me after she lied to my parents and made me the bad guy?

So, a bit of backstory: I (26F) have a younger sister (22F), and while we’re pretty close, she has this one friend, Sarah (23F), who I’ve never really gotten along with. Sarah has always been super manipulative and has a tendency to lie to get attention, but my sister has always brushed it off. Recently, Sarah’s behavior reached a new level, and it’s causing major tension in our family. Sarah had been staying at our parents’ house for a while because she was having "issues" at home (long story short, her parents are divorced and there’s some drama there). My parents were kind enough to let her stay, but recently Sarah got into a huge argument with them about something trivial, and she decided to storm out, claiming they were “unfair.” So, Sarah asked my sister if she could stay at my place for a while. I’m super big on boundaries, especially when it comes to my living space, so I said no at first. I didn’t want to get caught in the middle of her drama, and I knew it would cause tension between me and my sister. But my sister begged, saying that Sarah had nowhere else to go and that she’d only be there for a few days. Reluctantly, I agreed to let her crash on my couch for a week. Things immediately started going downhill. Sarah was super messy, would make passive-aggressive comments about how “unwelcoming” my place felt, and didn’t respect any of my rules. One night, after I asked her to clean up after herself, she went behind my back and told my parents that I was being “cold and rude” to her and “refused to let her stay” (which was a total lie, I had already agreed for her to stay!). I didn’t find out until my parents called me to ask what was going on. They were furious and told me I needed to apologize and make up with Sarah. I was livid. I told my parents the truth—that I had let Sarah stay with me, but she had completely disrespected my space and made things uncomfortable. Still, they sided with Sarah, saying I should just “tolerate her” for the sake of family peace. At this point, I had had enough. I told my sister that Sarah could no longer stay with me because I was not going to be manipulated by her or anyone else. My sister tried to guilt-trip me, saying I was being a bad sister and I should just “deal with it.” After a huge argument, I kicked Sarah out of my place. Now, my parents and sister are angry at me, and Sarah is spreading rumors that I’m a terrible person. I feel like I did the right thing, but I’m starting to wonder if I’m being too harsh. AITA for refusing to let my sister’s toxic friend stay with me, even though my family is mad?

2026-01-20 21:08:25

Anya Petrova

AITA

AITA for not allowing step daughter to mess with my things?

My stepdaughter and husband are upset because I put a stop to her losing or breaking my belongings. My husband is upset because when my stepdaughter gets angry, she goes through my stuff and destroys it. I started locking my vanity drawers and putting my belongings away. He told me this puts him in a bad place with his daughter while she’s angry and that he isn't having any of it. He stated that everything is replaceable except his relationship with his daughter and that she should be allowed to be angry. My stepdaughter, who is 6, is upset that I’m not sharing with her and believes she should be allowed because “she’s sharing her dad with me.” I do not react in the moment when she does this because it is not mature; I just pick up the pieces and cry in another room. I have a prenup, and everything I own was bought with my own money. She recently cut up an LV bag I saved for in high school with scissors. She also found my box of mementos from childhood through high school and spilled everything in a tub of water. I am absolutely devastated. She has also been breaking my makeup and got into my wallet, cutting up cash, cards, and my driver's license. I had enough and quietly put away the rest of my belongings. My stepdaughter found out when she went to my bathroom and noticed my vanity was locked, and she freaked out. When my husband came to see about her, he was so upset with me that I’m alienating her from us and making her feel unwelcome. I told him if she needed something specific, she could ask, and I would get it for her. He responded that since we are married, what’s mine is his, and his daughter's, and vice versa. In the past, he said he would replace whatever was broken, but he has not. I tried talking with her, but she does not want to listen, and when I asked him to talk with her, he responds that I am making nothing into something and that I am not a parent nor am I allowed to parent her.

2026-01-20 21:08:17

Jonas Bergström

Relationships

Update: AITA for taking my daughter's phone away for exposing my "dirty laundry" to her friends in a group chat?

I don't know the rules about how quickly you can post an update but I'm posting one because it only takes two seconds to hand back a phone and apologize which is what I did. shortly after the thread began getting a lot of comments ( which also is why I stopped replying). My daughter said that it's ok and that she didn't mean to say that I was boring- she says that she just thinks her dad is somebody who would much sooner reward bad behavior than good and that if I had been a liar, or even a cheater, somebody who mouthed off to him or snuck around he would have found that more worthy of love and that's very sad. I know the thread became about the one incident with my daughter, but I think I at least partially it was a cry for help because I think I am coming to terms with the fact that the last time I worked for an extended period of time I was 19 working for a family friend who owned a store. I remember when I first got married briefly helping my ex's father one day in the office of his business where he told me to write out a few checks ( by hand) to vendors. When I first started looking for jobs an acquaintance looked at me sideways when I told her about my experience issuing handwritten checks for bookkeeping as I saw a posting for a bookkeeper jobs and realized how out of it I was. My church has helped me- the bishop gave me money to pay 1/3 of my monthly rent once but in exchange I did deep cleaning work and was on call to do other odd jobs whenever he asked and had to give him access to all my financial statements. He also asked questions about why I wasn't maintaining good relations enough with my children's father such that he decided to file for divorce. I am very grateful for the help he gave and will treasure it always but want to do it on my own. So I am posting this update not just to update on the situation but to ask if anybody has any suggestions. My daughter is very worried because recently I've had health issues. I was recently treated for two STDs, one of which was bacterial but another which will affect me for the rest of my life. I also have issues with swelling from arthritis. So I posted the original because somehow I hope to be able to retire somewhere in my seventies. I understand retiring comfortably is asking too much but just enough to live alone and not starve. I got advice about my ex's SS benefits and I'm hoping that will be enough but if anybody has any tips, I would appreciate it too. I just want to live in dignity in my old age because I know health only continues to dip at my age and while I can do the grocery job I'm once I don't know about when I'm 70. I talk with other women who are facing divorce on this but they refuse to address the topic saying I shouldn't act like this is something to put anybody in paralyzing fear over. i try not to be scared but feel lost.

2026-01-20 21:08:15

Clara Jensen

Family

AITA for secretly helping my brother’s wife leave him?

My brother and I were super close growing up, but over the years I’ve noticed how controlling he is with his wife. She has reached out to me a few times about how she’s not allowed to work, has no social media, and needs to “check in” constantly when she’s out. He says it’s “traditional,” but it feels like control. I tried to talk to him about it in a very polite manner, but he quickly shushed me. A few months ago, she said she felt trapped. I encouraged her to talk to him, but he brushed her off. Eventually, she asked if I could help her find a job and a place to stay. I paid for a temporary rental and helped her quietly land a remote job under my name so my brother wouldn’t find out. Two weeks ago, she timed him and moved out while he was at work. He was furious and said I betrayed him and I was disloyal to him when he found out I was involved, said I “destroyed his marriage” and “betrayed blood.” Our parents are split: mom says I saved her, dad says I broke up a family. I know I went behind his back, but I couldn’t watch her live like a prisoner.

2026-01-20 21:08:13

Luca Moretti

AITA

AITA for buying my daughter a bag of chips?

I'm a parent in a blended family that has moved into my (slightly too small for us all) house last year. There is of course friction, and I'm not always perfect but this one has me second guessing myself. My daughter has a specific type of potato chip she likes. She's picky, it's annoying, but really that's probably irrelevent. Anyhow a few months ago I went to the grocery store, and among several other bags of chips, I bought a family sized bag of those. Her step brother ate it in one sitting that night. He's a teenage boy. He's not fat. I don't really have a major problem with that. But then my daughter had nothing she liked while he proceeded to devour another type of chip the next day. Annoying, but NBD. Next week I got 2 bags of those chips. Well, then the 2 bags were gone in 2 days. Third week I got 2 bags and told my daughter to keep one in her room. This has pretty much been the state of affairs ever since. Well, my spouse found out my daughter was keeping special food in her room, and I said "yeah I told her to" and she got really really mad at me. She said that I was treating her kids as lesser and that I wasn't making this their home too, and a bunch of other things. I honestly try to see her viewpoint but I just don't here. I didn't tell the boy to stay out of my daughter's stuff, or take it away from him. I tried to sidestep the friction altogether. I didn't take anything away, I just bought twice as much and let her keep half as her own. I feel like the only other options are to either to put $70 of potato chips into my weekly budget, or to tell my daughter to deal with having nothing. Both those options suck. On the flip side, people have been telling me for years I suck at understanding other's feelings....so... AITA?

2026-01-20 21:08:11

Anya Petrova

WIBTA

WIBTA for announcing my engagement the day before my sister's baby shower

I (30F) am the oldest of 3 siblings and have the typical eldest daughter syndrome. 8 yrs ago I went through a hellacious divorce and that greatly disappointed my very religious family. We used to be very close but since I have more or less walked away from the religion and live my life differently than them, we aren't close any more and they often will be passive aggressive or down right rude to me about my life choices. My dad passed away 4 years ago and I am really the only one who keeps in touch with his mom (98F). My sister (28F) is pregnant with her first child. My gmaw and sister both live in different states, but are coming to town for a baby shower hosted by my mom this coming Saturday. (I was the one who suggested we invite gmaw and volunteered to drive her up.) My fiance and I are very private about our relationship; we have been together almost 5 years and recently quietly got engaged. No social media posts, just told to a few close friends and then people notice when they see me wearing the ring. I have not told my family yet. I was feeling very excited about getting to show my gmaw my ring and tell her I'm engaged on Fri when I see her since I don't get to see her in person very often and I know I have limited time left with her. I was talking about it with my friend and he said that I would be an asshole to "steal the spot light" by announcing my engagement right before my sister's baby shower. I thought it would be ok given that it's the day before the baby shower, with immediate family only, and it's not like I'm making a toast at the party to announce I'm engaged. Also since I'm not super close with my family and this is just the next time we see one another, I don't want to take off my ring to hide the fact I'm engaged, so it felt natural but now I'm worried that it's a d*** move for me to do this.

2026-01-20 21:08:02

Anya Petrova

AITA

AITAH for attempting to cut my mom off from me after she said my SA was my fault?

I (18m) a few years back got SA'd at my mom's friend's party, and it isn't a experience I will explain, but the main point is my mom the next day made me tell her everything that happened and demanded me to tell her what happened, which fucked me up a lot. After a few months later, we would get into a argument for reasons I can't even remember but in this argument my SA came up and I was angry that nothing had been done to the guy, and after several minutes of arguing, my mom says "to be fair, you put yourself in that situation" which pretty much was her saying it's my fault I had that happened. Shes gone on to say this 3 times further and it is clear to me now that she doesn't believe she's in the wrong. During another argument I bought this up to her and she tried to say she was trying to teach me how to pick up on a situation like that, which made me madder even more because she's always trying to teach me everything like I'm 10 and now she's trying to turn my trauma into a lesson of life rather than validate my emotions and comfort me. As of late Ive been snippy towards her and overall just annoyed when she's in her presence because she acts like nothing happened. She works at the school I go to and all the kids LOVE her there and it pisses me off because she has the gall to be all nice to everyone but when it comes to me its like she doesn't give a shit. I've told her that she's scarred me forever by saying the sh it she said and she just walks away in the arguments because she doesn't wanna deal with it. I don't love her anymore and Everytime Im around her I feel my day getting significantly shittier by the second while being in her presence. Is what I'm doing justified?

2026-01-20 21:08:02

Elise Dubois