Category - Advice

Fresh updates and insights

My Mom Refused To Help With The Wedding So I Uninvited Her And My Dad Is Furious

I’m engaged to the love of my life. We’ll call her Sarah. Sarah doesn’t have issues with my parents but there is a little tension on both sides and no one has attempted to be close, which is fine I guess. It makes me a little sad that they are not more excited about her. Sarah asked my mom the other day if she would help make centerpieces. Sarah is into DIY but we are running out of time and she was asking around to see who would be willing to help. She admitted to my mom that it was kind of grunt work and if she didn’t want to, no pressure. My mom got offended and said of course she doesn’t want to, we haven’t cared about her at all, so she doesn’t care about our fucking wedding. This hurt Sarah but she didn’t fight back. Sarah told me and I called my mom. Honestly I probably went into it a big aggressively, but I yelled at her for saying that to Sarah. My mom said that Sarah hasn’t included her in any of the fun parts, or cared about her opinion on anything, so why would she help make centerpieces. I asked her to apologize to Sarah and my mom said no, she was done talking about it, so I uninvited her to the wedding. My dad sent me a text, because I said he could still come, and pretty much told me to fuck off if I thought he would come without my mom. My mom is now upset because everyone is going to ask where she is. Sarah is very happy and feels like I defended her, and literally everyone else thinks I’m the asshole.

2025-10-07 12:11:36

Clara Jensen

Advice

My manager tried to force me to help a scammer so I quit on the spot

Last year, I worked at a small budget grocery store. A guy wanted three $500 prepaid Visa Gift Cards. I immediately say, "Hold on, are you sure this isn't an advanced fee scam?" "No, no, they are for my personal use." THAT is the response that phone scammers TELL people to say if they are asked about why they are buying large denominations of cards. There were two tills at this store: mine, and the manager's. For some reason, the manager wasn't allowed to sell that amount of gift cards on their OWN terminal. (Possibly an anti-theft measure?) But that meant that the $1500 of Visa Gift Cards HAD to be rung up on MY terminal. But I didn't feel good about this, so... I refused. I asked the customer what they were for, if it wasn't a scam. If he gives me an alternate reason, like "My three kids are all getting PS5s," I would have done it. But he refuses to clarify and apparently can't even make up a lie. When I refuse to budge, the man leaves... I presume to talk to the scammer outside on his phone. We call up the head manager and she says... well, we warned him, and that's all we can do. I say that we could do a LITTLE more and refuse to participate in this folderol. Let him go somewhere else for his criminal activity. The manager on the floor says that I have to do it, because she can't do it on hers. She literally tries to push me out of the way of my terminal to do it, and I stand my ground as she tries to hip-push me, in what must have been a rather pathetic display. She finally says, "you can do this, or you can leave." So I left. After I cooled down a bit and got lunch, I call the head manager again and ask her... "Should I even come in tomorrow? It's hard to hire people in December, so I AM willing to stay on. We can gamble on this not happening again." She decides that, nah, let's just make a clean break. I say, possibly interrupting her as she waffles, "Alright, then. Lose this number," and hang up on her. It sucks that this guy got taken for a ride, but it ALSO sucks that I basically threw the job away for no gain and he still got taken for a ride. (It was a minimum-wage job during the pandemic. I wasn't attached to it or anything.) A younger co-worker at my other job didn't understand why I did it. "They don't pay me enough to be a hero." My response was, "No, they don't pay me enough to be a villain."

2025-09-04 19:42:18

Elise Dubois

Family

Man Refuses Multiple Stops For Step-Sister On 12-Hour Drive And Declines To Drive Her Home, Sparking Family Outrage

My Mom and Step dad live around 12 hours from me by car, my step sister ‘Jane’ lives around 8 hours away but is enroute if I am driving. On Friday my girlfriend and I finished work at lunch, to drive to my moms to spend the week (my step brother is getting married on Saturday and we are going to work from home for a week). I begrudgingly agreed to pick up and drive Jane also, I was cautious of doing this as we have never got on and she finds a way to make everything an argument or political debate. Firstly when I arrived to pick her up, she made us wait outside for 30 minutes as she ‘hadn’t finished packing’. I was annoyed by this alone as it’s a long drive and I wanted to get there before 2am. Hour 1 of the journey (with Jane in the car), she requested to stop to use the restroom. So we stopped. Hour 2 of the journey she requested my girlfriend turned the music COMPLETELY off as she ‘didn’t like music’?? Hour 3 of the journey Jane wanted to stop for some food, I asked her to hold on an hour as I had already planned where we were stopping and getting gas and I wanted to limit stops. Jane then spent the next hour complaining of ‘feeling sick and faint’. Hour 4, we stopped and Jane disappeared for half an hour and when my girlfriend found her she was just sat outside on FaceTime one of her friends. Hour 5, we stopped because Jane needed to use the restroom. At which point Jane purchased another meal. Hour 6, I pulled over so Jane could sit shotgun as she was ‘getting car sick’. At which point she wanted to debate why marriage is archaic and exists to limit women. Hour 7, stopped for restroom and more snacks at Janes requests. Hour 8, we are on the final stretch to my Moms house and Jane requests to stop again. I say no, we are nearly there. Jane then says that she is going to be sick and we have to stop. I refuse, and say I will pull over if she’s going to actually be sick but we are 30 minutes away. When we arrive at my moms house she announces to my step dad, that I refused to stop the car for her and she’s so ill etc. My mom then shouts at me ‘because I know Jane is sensitive’. Jane is 29, I am 28 so not children. Since then all weekend Jane has made reference to it and told my girlfriend that I ‘can be cruel and nasty and has been since a child’. I have now said I am not driving her back, she now has no transport home. AITA?

2025-09-25 08:05:48

Clara Jensen

Advice

Stepmom Helped Teen With Period Pain and Now the Ex-Wife Is Threatening Legal Action

I am married to my husband who has a 17 year old daughter from his first marriage. We have been married for 4 years. So we have her this month because her mother was diagnosed with the big C that is floating around while it was our week with step daughter. She started her period last Thursday and it was bad. I am talking 3 days in bed, puking, cramps of hell. I had similar symptoms when I was her age and was diagnosed way to late with endo. By day 3 I asked her if this was normal for her and she said that she always has very bad periods, but that her doctor told her it's normal because some women are just less pain resistant. I was alarmed and told her it was absolutely not like that and her pain was not normal and she needs to get a second opinion. She asked me if I trusted my doctor and I told her yes. And she asked me if I could take her. I said of course and made an appt. We got an appt the next morning and because my husband was away on business I texted him to tell him what step daughter wanted. Next morning we go, I wait in the car. She comes back and breaks. Start crying saying that she felt so relieved that her pain is not normal and that while she gets screanings she got some pills to relieve her bleeding and pain (not contraception). When we came back she seemed euphoric and was chatting with her mom. When she was done her mom called me back and was furious with me. I am talking... Screaming calling me names etc. She said it was not my place and that the only people that have a day in her health are her and my husband. That is was very creepy from me to talk about her privates when we are at home and she said that she was going to go to her lawyer to only let us get visitation. I am stunned. My step daughter is old enough to make her own decisions regarding health... She is 17. I had no intentions but to help her because I went trough the same in my teens. I was not talking to her about her genitals. I was talking to her about periods... And I think that is pretty normal. My husband says that he agrees with me. But he is my husband and clearly biased. I would like to know what I did wrong and if I am in the wrong to apologize to my stepdaughters mom.

2025-11-08 20:16:57

Luca Moretti

Advice

Ex-husband wants to take our son on vacation and leave our daughter behind—I refused to help

My ex-husband and I divorced about 4 years ago. I have taken a couple vacations with the kids since the divorce, he went on one trip with them, which was cancelled after 1 day due to a hurricane. He makes a LOT of snide remarks about how much I pay for the vacations, but I live a pretty frugal life and my kids are my splurge. We have 50/50 custody and neither of us pay child support. My ex has family in Texas. They live on a lake, with an in ground pool and a boat. They are close with him, he has a standing invite. The trip would cost my ex a flight, probably 1 or 2 meals out. My ex seems to be buying a new truck, bought a one wheel, joined a golf club, and makes solid money. I don’t think he’s hurting, and I don’t begrudge him any of it. I just wish he’d take my two kids on the vacation they desperately want with him, but I respect that he has every right to spend his money how he wants to. Here is where it gets weird: monday he asked me what I’m doing for Labor Day, which according to our divorce agreement is his holiday with the kids. I don’t have plans, so he asked if I could ‘babysit’ (eye roll) my daughter so he can take my son to Texas. I asked why he wasn’t going to take my daughter and he said the trip is my sons birthday present and if my daughter asks to go to Texas for her birthday, he’ll take her alone. My kids are close, and if asked, I know my son wouldn’t WANT to go without his sister. I told him I didn’t want to put the kids in that position, and he should ask his girlfriend (lives with them, been together 4 years, stays with the kids when he travels for work) to just stay home with her, but apparently she’s going on the trip too. I told him it was playing favorites and I wouldn’t enable it, and he blew up on me. We have a history of him being abusive, so I know I can be very quick to jump to conclusions and get protective of my kids. I know this would hurt my daughter, but maybe I’m over reacting? He called my controlling and I am trying to decide if he has any basis for that statement. Note: if he books the trip without her, I 100{39ca6eb452c0ce4419cd73a8f3bd18a23fe95ab4febb092bc2ab1b542eeea82f} will watch her, and he knows it.

2025-09-22 12:36:24

Luca Moretti

Advice

Man Who Separated From Ex-Wife Due to Infertility Now Expecting with New Partner, Seeks Advice on Sharing the News Without Hurting His Ex

My ex-wife is a complete girly-girl who loves children and always wanted a big family. She is a primary-school teacher and was a doula for her sister's births. We started trying when we were both 28 and had been married for 5 years. After 18 months without success we both got fertility testing. I was found to be infertile. I went through several diagnostic procedures and treatments that, frankly, I would like to forget. I was told the odds of me conceiving naturally were close to zero. We considered IVF, but the specialist said it was not viable. The whole episode took about 5 years from beginning to resignation. I was upset, but my ex-wife was devastated. She was briefly hospitalized for an acute depressive episode in 2015. It did not help that her younger sister had 5 children by that time. My ex-wife wanted to use a sperm donor. I understand that biology isn't everything, but despite counseling and my best efforts at rationalization, I could never moderate the feeling of revulsion at the idea of choosing to raise another man’s child. I knew I could never see the child as mine… maybe a stepchild... at best. My SIL called that toxic masculinity. ;( So... unstoppable force meets an immovable object. Deal-breaker. We divorced in 2017. It was a strange divorce, we both loved and supported each other throughout. We were still living together until about six months after the finalization, when my ex-SIL started finding men for my ex-wife to date. I then made myself scarce. We briefly reunited numerous times during the next year and are in each other’s wider social circle to this day. As I understand it, she has had no long-term relationships since our divorce, and surprisingly, no children. In mid-2018 I met my current GF. I revealed my infertility early in the relationship. She said she always thought she would have children, but she was young enough that by the time she was ready, maybe they could fix me. I pointed-out that this was setting-up both of us for future heartache, but I had fallen for her, so I wasn't going to argue. In April this year she missed her period. When the test came back positive, her first reaction was to go into full panic mode and swear she had never cheated on me. I never doubted her but realized that’s what every cheated-on partner says. But hey, you can now get a prenatal paternity blood test as early as 7 Weeks. Who knew?! The baby is mine, we are both delighted. I went to a fertility doc to see if anything had changed. It hadn’t. How did this happen then? His answer: "you won the lottery". Part of my problem was that the few sperm I did produce were deformed, so we have undertaken every available prenatal screening. This is also why we have only told 4 other people. But now we have the all clear. I share numerous friends and acquaintances with my ex-wife. We cannot conceal this from her. I know her, and although it has been two years since we were close, I know this will devastate her. My GF knows all the history and is totally supportive. She thinks that telling my ex-wife before she finds out is the right thing to do. How should I go about it? Should I contact my ex-wife’s sister or mother so they can be there? Maybe write a letter they can deliver? Tell her to her face? Ick. I do not want to cause my ex-wife any more pain than is inevitable.

2025-09-20 14:57:55

Luca Moretti

Family

Father's Misjudged Humor Damages Relationship With His Son Post-Outing, Asks For Advice To Fix It

Using my lurking account - It's been pointed out my title wording makes the post seem worse than it is, I apologize for that, it wasn't my intention. So, I've always known my son had an interest in men. He was slow on the pick up of incognito mode, and from the searches he made, I figured he was at least "Bi-curious" (if that's the proper term for it) since he hit puberty. Well, last year, he started bringing a boy around, and it was obvious they were dating, to the point I figured that he knew I knew, and it wanst a big deal to anyone. Well, apparently, I was wrong. After school yesterday he and his boyfriend came up to me and said there was something really important they needed to tell me. My son said that they were dating and had been for a year. Well... I was surprised that he wasn't aware I knew and was a bit thrown off. My mouth moved faster than my brain and I said "Well, thats pretty fucking gay." Now, I thought it was peak comedy, since it is infact gay. However, I understand using the word gay in that way gives it a very negative undertone, hence the mouth faster than brain comment. Now my son and I are usually pretty "edgy" with our humor, this being fairly tame for the stuff we joke about. While probably not appropriate for the situation, it wasn't our norm for a conversation between us. However, he and his boyfriend were very, very upset and left. I'm probably the asshole but I thought I would check, and see if yall had some advice on what I can say to fix it. He currently won't respond to my texts or calls. Iiiiii did not expect this to gain so much traction. It's a bit intimidating, lol. I am reading all the comments, though. Anyways, here is a small update - Hes at his grandparents' house, which I knew. He told them to tell me he'll be home tomorrow after school to talk. I'll update you all after the conversation. Thank you for your responses. I really appreciate it.

2025-10-04 17:55:49

Jonas Bergström

Family

AITA for Refusing to Help My Sister After What She Did to Me?

I (28M) have a younger sister "Kelly" (26F). When I was in college, I worked to pay my expenses while Kelly received parental support, like new phones and vacations. I saved money after graduating to buy my first home. Kelly became pregnant, her boyfriend left, and my parents asked me to give her my house savings so she could 'get back on her feet.' I refused, as I felt I should not pay for her choices. My parents ended up mortgaging their house to help her. Last month, I bought my house. Kelly attended the housewarming BBQ late, barely spoke to me, and complained about my success compared to her 'crappy apartment.' Two days later, I learned Kelly told people at the BBQ that I bought the house by 'stealing inheritance money.' I confronted her, and she smirked, saying, 'Well, maybe you should’ve helped me when I needed it.' I told her she was toxic, selfish, and that I was done with her. Now, Kelly’s babysitter quit, and my parents are begging me to watch her kid, using the line, “Family sticks together,” and saying I need to 'be the bigger person.' I refused. Now the family is calling me a jerk for punishing an innocent child. I work full-time and this is not my responsibility. Am I wrong for refusing to help after everything she did?

2025-10-28 12:02:22

Anya Petrova

Advice

My Mom Called Me Dramatic For Years—Now I Am Infertile Because She Refused To Get Me Help

I have had bad periods ever since I was fourteen. With bad, I mean vomiting, cramps that make me cry, diarrhea whenever I eat something. When I was thirteen, I begged my mother to see a gynecologist for this and she agreed. I told him that this surely wasn't normal and that I wanted him to take a closer look. He basically told me that some girls are in more pain than others and that I will get used to it eventually. My mother was present. After that, she didn't let me see another doctor about the issue and told me that he had gone to med school and knew best. I didn't question it from then on: My mum always said I had a low pain tolerance, my OBGYN said it was normal, so it was clearly my problem, right? Still, the pain persisted and my mum wasn't any help. She screamed at me when I was sent home from school because I cried so hard during class, she rolled her eyes when I asked for Ibuprofen (she believes in homeopathy which is fine but wasn't successful with me) and made fun of my 'dramatic outbursts' whenever I told her I couldn't go to a family gathering because it hurt so much. She was a loving mother otherwise, but she just never believed me when I said I was hurt, even when it wasn't about my period (almost died of pneumonia when I was sixteen after getting told for a week straight that I didn't have to go to a doctor and had just caught a cold, but that's for another time) or that I needed to see another OBGYN. I'm twenty now and moved out two months ago and the first thing I did was going to a different doctor. I don't want to go into detail but I have a rare-ish condition that causes my symptoms. I makes me infertile. I'm in a stage where it isn't treatable anymore; I won't ever be able to get children, not anymore. The thing that's most heartbreaking to me is that he said that it would have been treatable, had I come two to three years sooner. So if my mother had taken me to another doctor when I asked her, I'd probably still be fertile. It was hard to swallow. Yesterday I was visiting my mother and surprise! I got my period. I told her I needed to go because my period was starting. Of course, she tried to give me shit for it again and I completely blew up on her, telling her how I could never have children because of her, how she should have listened to me instead of blaming me for my own pain! My sister told me later that I was an AH for blaming her when she couldn't have known about my condition. I am aware that I could have gone to the doctor sooner but back then she was paying for my medical bills and if she would have noticed me making appointments on my own... It would have caused a fight. Also, I was told throughout everything it was normal and that I was being dramatic. I didn't know any better, I feel like it would have been her responsibility to believe me that it was really bad and allow me to seek a second opinion. EDIT: Spelling Edit 2: I did some research after a few comments; there was a post about a woman with similar issues, I didn tknow of it when I posted this and I didn't copy them. It looks like a coincidence

2025-09-10 18:27:31

Elise Dubois

Advice

AITA For No Longer Helping My Stepdaughter?

I have been with my husband John for over six years. We have two children: his daughter Kim, whom I have helped raise since she was nine, and our six-month-old son, Sam. Kim's mother is not in her life. The conflict began when I asked Kim to help with chores while I cared for Sam. Kim yelled that I am not her real mother and locked herself in her room. When John came home, he agreed with her. He told me I overstepped my boundaries and that Kim's only focus should be homework, while housework should be my job. I was heartbroken because I always treated Kim as my own daughter. I told them I would respect their wishes but would no longer go out of my way for her. Now, I do not help with her homework, provide rides, or contribute to her college fund. I only cook and do her laundry. My husband and Kim are struggling with this change, and I feel conflicted about continuing.

2026-04-10 19:38:18

Luca Moretti

Advice

AITAH for telling my niece I can’t help pay her college?

My 52M younger brother passed away 10 years ago to cancer, leaving behind an 8-year-old daughter. About two years after his death, his wife remarried and they moved to a different state, taking my niece with them. Her new stepdad was good to her, and when she was around 14, he adopted her and she took his last name. At that point, she ghosted our family and said she did not want anything to do with us. She even rejected my mother, who passed away from a heart attack a few months later. We suspected the rejection played a huge part in her death, so we stopped reaching out because we were angry. A couple of months ago, she reached out after years of silence to ask for her part of my mother's inheritance. I told her there was nothing left, as everything was left to my sister and me, and most of it went to my own children's college. She became angry, insulted my deceased mother, and demanded I pay for her college because she claims it represents her late father's share. She also tried to guilt my sister, who also refused because she used her share to pay off debt. She continues to harass me for money. While I might have helped her if she had been polite, her history of disrespect and her current aggressive demands make it impossible. I want to resolve this without involving the police out of respect for my late brother, but her harassment is making it very difficult.

2026-06-27 13:04:54

Clara Jensen

Family

AITA for telling my sister if the show she kept sending me clips of didn't help her understand why I'm no contact with our dad then there's no hope for her?

I (31F) have three siblings. I have an older brother who's 32 and two younger sisters who are 27 and 26. When we were kids our mom died from cancer. 18 months later our dad met and married his second wife, who had also lost her husband and had three children with him. They knew each other for less than two months when they decided we were all going to be one big blended family. Then it took less than a year for the word adoption to come up. They wanted to adopt each other's kids. Three of us were not okay with this. Me and my brother and then wife #2's oldest son. We were the three who remembered our late parents really well and didn't want to have a new mom or dad. This did not matter to the adults. My dad told me and my brother that our younger sisters were on board and our younger two stepsiblings were on board and majority rules. I was 10 years old at the time and it had been 3 years since my mom had died. The house became a battle field after this decision because they could not get us older three on board and when they went through the process to adopt each other's kids, they were denied the ability to adopt the three of us who didn't want it. So the younger four kids were adopted by their stepparent. The older three were not. The anger could be felt by all the kids and the younger ones blamed us and didn't understand why we weren't on board. Wife #2 and I argued a lot in my teens. She tried to reach out to me as a mother and I rejected her as a mother. I could be civil and respectful if she was just an adult. But I told her I didn't want another mother and she didn't like that. She would also tell me how much it hurt that me and my brother didn't want to be her kids. She'd say she loved us and all she wanted was to call all 7 of us her kids. She said she could not understand the need for us to hold onto the dead and she said it's not like we didn't still see our late parents families so we should grow the fuck up and let them be happy. I told her she should grow the fuck up and accept she can't force people to be her kids. There were several attempts to push the adoption through without us wanting it and legally it was rejected every time. We were even dragged to a (church) therapist who tried to talk us into submission about the topic. The relationships were all very strained. My relationship with my brother is the only strong one today and we're both no contact with our dad and wife #2. To the best of my knowledge wife #2's oldest son has no contact with anyone, including his siblings. My brother and I still have a relationship, albeit a strained one, with our sisters. They were invited to our weddings and have met our kids. But they don't approve of the no contact and they are on a lower contact now because they have said our kids should know dad and wife #2. I disagree and have said it would not be healthy but my sister's don't overly care. There was a show on TLC a few years ago called the Blended Bunch. I never watched it but saw some clips and it hit close to home. One of my sisters saw it and sent me TikTok clips that centered around some of the kids not wanting to be adopted and one of the relatives of the family being the voice of reason. Only my sister kept saying I was a shithead like the relative who said they wouldn't want it either and it was wrong to force on the kids. I told her after several comments that if the clips didn't help her see why I went no contact and how awful it is to see crying kids and to still try and push them then there's no hope for her at all. I told her she didn't live through the experience in the same way our brother and I did. Her reply back was that I was ungrateful and should see those kids being brats and trying to ruin a good thing just like we did. She also told me to say there's no hope for her shows how repulsive I am as a person. After all this I'm pretty sure no contact will need to extend to both sisters (because both act the same only one has TikTok for this interaction). But I could still be an AH in this so I'm asking if I am (or not).

2025-11-27 12:00:54

Anya Petrova

Advice

AITA for "abandoning helpless women in the wilderness"?

I, mid-30s M, work for my USA state's park system (big forests and wilderness areas type parks, that is). I spend most of my time outdoors and do a ton of hiking. The day this happened I was finishing up a long, challenging hike on my day off at a nearby large wildlife refuge that is privately owned (i.e., not a state park/my place of employment, though I know everyone who works there). The refuge has a trail system with four trails of differing difficulties and lengths, from blue (wide, easy, about 2.5 miles) to red (difficult, 16.5 miles). All trails loop and share the same start/end. So a person like me doing red will spend some time on the trails with those doing the other ones. I was in the last mile or so before the parking lot and was pretty bushed from the long trail. I heard really loud screaming/moaning up ahead and ran to see what was happening. I came upon two women, who I'd learn were mother and daughter (hard to tell ages, I'm guessing 50s and 30s. Not elderly). Both, especially the mother were heavy-set (this may matter). The mother was the one wailing as she sat on a rock. I was concerned (she's shrieking in a forest, after all). I learned that, oh yes, she's "horribly" injured. In the mile and a half they'd done on blue, she had developed a blister. Don't get me wrong, blisters hurt, I know very well. But I truly thought she was being murdered when I heard her. I didn't say anything negative. I have a nicely stocked med kit in my pack, with all sorts of options for blisters, so I offered her whatever she likes. She took her shoe off and stuck her leg at me, clearly indicating that I'm to treat the blister. Yeah, no. Not happening. No strange lady feet in the forest for me. I politely refused and again offered her the med kit. Mother starts moaning and crying. Daughter speaks up for the first time, something along the lines of "just do it." I refused again and put some blister bandages on the rock. I made to move on, and Mother demanded water, very rudely. Yeah, no, I have a hydration pack. She isn't putting her mouth on my bite valve. I'm now fully over helping these people. I made to leave ("well, you're almost to the trail end, so I'll be going"), and she demanded I help her out of the forest. Without waiting, she's on her feet and leaning her full weight on me, with an arm around my neck/shoulders. She weighed at least double what I do, and the way she flung herself on me wrenched my back. I moved away quickly, she lost her balance a bit but didn't fall. I said that I was leaving, that we're less than a mile from parking, and that I was done with this encounter. We all had cell service, so I told them that if she needed to be carried out because of a fucking blister, they could call people paid to deal with their shit (I said both curse words). They scream at me for abandoning helpless women in the wilderness and call me names as I walk on. The daughter called me fatphobic (not sure why, I never said anything at all related to that). I yelled back that I just wasn't interested in their brand of bullshit. I got to my car ten minutes or so later and left. On my way out of the park I stopped at the office. I know everyone there and give them a heads up about the women.

2025-11-27 11:46:33

Luca Moretti

Advice

My Dad Calls Me 'The Thing' To My Face So I Refused To Keep Helping Him

My parents are both in their 80s and live about two hours from me. For reference, I have a sibling that lives right down the road from them. Neither of them have aged well- they always refused to be active and have lived very sedentary lives in their retirement so aging has been hard on them. My father especially has struggled with type 2 diabetes and dementia/alzheimers. He is very combative and mean about everything, which is how he has always been, but dementia and old age has made it worse. He directs a lot of his anger towards me and is especially mad that I am trying to get them to move into assisted living because they fall constantly and need so much help. Anytime he disagrees with me about anything he starts screaming and calling me names including “ fat-a** and “the thing.” “The thing” hurts especially hard because I am his daughter and he is reducing me to something that is hardly human. He will say “ don’t look at the thing over there, she’s so ugly she might break your face” or just ridiculous stuff. He does this when he is completely lucid and remembering everything/everyone. Or he will say “ don’t feed the thing,” when my mom tries to offer me food. I tried so hard to ignore this treatment, but once he did it in front of my kids I put my foot down and stopped visiting. My mother now wants me to come to her 3+ times a week to help with cooking,cleaning, helping dress my father, etc. i have said no because the way he treats me is terrible and I have to look out for my own well being. She says I just need to ignore it because he is old and grumpy. She says I take things too personally and I am obligated to help them because they raised me. AITA for saying they need either a full time nurse or assisted living? UPDATE: Thank you all so much for your feedback, advice and commiserations. I am going to tell them they need assisted living or an in home nurse, but it is not me anymore. I do want to also add that while my father does have dementia this mean and cruel behavior and my mother’s behavior is not new, they have always been this way with me, my father just has less restraint in his old age.

2025-09-24 13:33:57

Jonas Bergström

Advice

Husband Refused to Help With My Dying Mom's Bills But Now Wants My Entire Inheritance

I am (29f) a SAHM, I take care of the home and my son (4m) while my husband Sam (31m) works. I haven't had a job in four years as Sam wanted me to be a SAHM by the time our son was born. I accepted, since Sam has an absurdly good salary, and mine was not that great. My mom fell ill half a year ago. Her diabetes became quite complicated and she needed some medical care. We don't live in the US, so the expenses were relatively small. I asked Sam to please give me half of the total medical bill, since my brother (25m) was going to pay the other half. Sam refused to pay a penny from the bill, and since I have no income, my brother had to pay it all. Sadly, my mom passed away a month ago. My brother and I just got the whole estate in order. Each of us is going to get a somewhat considerable figure, since my mother had some properties (which she did not sell as they are in poor condition). This morning my husband told me he wants me to sell my my part of the inheritance, so we can make some (non-vital) house repairs and possibly go on vacation. I laughed, more out of anger than anything else, and told him that he had no right to suggest how to make use of the inheritance that my mother left, when he refused to even pay half of her medical bills. He called me an AH and went to work. I got a call from his sister, who was extremely angry. She called me irrational and told me that since I was living off the money Sam earns, I have no right to demand money from him, and that the inheritance gives me the opportunity to return some of the money he has spent on me. The call really got me thinking, and now I wonder if I'm really behaving like an AH. Edit: I've received a lot of comments asking the same questions, so I will answer them here. 1.- Why did my brother and I received an large inheritance but helped my mom with the treatment? My mom didn't leave us cash, she left us properties (4 in total). This properties are basically in ruins, and need a ton of work done, so my mom didn't receive any income from this properties. She placed two of them for sale, but they never sold since the real state market is extremely expensive here. 2.- Why did my mom paid her “main treatment”? My mom paid the hospital her entire treatment there, so, her hospitalizacion or any larger procedure. My brother and I wanted to help her with medical appointments (she visited several especialists outside the hospital) and medicines (the hospital didn't cover them). That's why I said that the the expenses were relatively small. Apologies if my redaction is confusive. 3.- I made the mistake of commenting that my husbands earns five zeros, but it's in my currency. Not in dollars. He earns montly about 12 thousand american dollars.

2025-10-19 19:52:48

Anya Petrova

Advice

Woman’s Dine-And-Dash Scheme Goes Spectacularly Wrong After Latest Victim Requests Separate Checks Thanks To Friendly Tip-Off

I (28m) work with this woman Lydia (24f) who has a very annoying habit. She has a dating profile that she uses specifically to lure guys to buying her expensive dinners at restaurants she wants to try and then ghosts them. Lydia brags about this all the time, and is never interested in actually dating, but she’ll act like it to sell it. I can’t stand this because it’s playing with people’s hearts, but Lydia thinks of it as a life hack to try food or drinks she otherwise couldn’t afford. My friend Daniel (32m) is also on dating sites, but for the right reasons. His late wife died a few years ago, and he’s just started jumping back into the dating scene. Daniel’s a very sweet guy, and I really want him to find a great lady for him. A few days ago, he texted me asking if I knew Lydia. They matched and got to talking about work, which is how he found out we worked at the same place. I told him all about Lydia’s BS with the restaurant thing, and made it very clear to him he would do best to drop things with her early on. Daniel said he’d probably still do the date but ask for separate checks. Well they went out this past weekend and on Monday Lydia came into work very upset. I asked her how her date with Daniel went, and she ripped into me asking if I was the one who told him not to pay for her dinner. Apparently she had Daniel take her to a high end steakhouse and she ended up splurging. She got a drink, a full entree with a side and dessert where Daniel just ordered a sandwich and salad. Her bill alone came to $70 something, and she was almost in tears at work as she didn’t expect to pay for it and now her car was low on gas. I got a little upset too as she tried to use my friend as a literal meal ticket, but somehow she doesn’t see it that way. Daniel told me later the date was going kind of well until he asked for separate checks, and then Lydia just got weirdly cold. So now Lydia’s mad at me because I told someone about her little tactic and it backfired on her. I don’t feel like I did anything wrong since it was a grieving friend I was protecting but some other people we work with said I should have stayed out of it because it was none of my business

2025-10-05 10:18:47

Luca Moretti

Advice

My Dad Refused To Help Us For Years So I Finally Kicked Him Out Of My Mom's House

My (19M) parents got divorced when I was about 10 and my mom always provided for us. She had an amazing job and me and my brother (17M) got everything we needed and wanted. My dad on the other hand, was jealous of my mom making a lot more money than him and when they were still together my mom would pay for everything (even my dads credit cards). After they divorced, whenever me or my brother would ask him for money (to buy school stuff or anything) he would refuse and say “Tell your mom, she has a lot of money”. Sadly my mom had stage 4 cancer, and when she started getting weaker she told me and my brother to be careful around my dad, specially with money because he would try to claim the heritage. I didn’t want to believe her, since he was my dad. I didn’t think he was capable of doing such a thing (She knew she didn’t have much time left). After my mom passed away, we decided the best thing to do was to live with our dad (In my moms House), and all my mom told us about turned out to be true. He hasn’t provided for us as he should and wanted to claim the heritage, because we shouldn’t have access to so much money. (I plan to invest the money) He has been living there rent free since my mom passed away. He hasn’t gave us a penny, he wants us to use the money my mom left us, that I would like to use to invest and finance my studies. Fast forward a few years, I’m studying in Europe and I’m financing my studies on my own and being honest, I’m having a hard time paying for everything (rent, health insurance, food etc.) My dad hasn’t give me a penny and I decided to kick him out of the house so that I can rent it and finance my studies and my brother’s. He refused and I proceeded with a lawyer. Of course I wan and he now blames me because I should help him, he’s my father. But he never helped me. AITA? I tried to tell it as short as I could, a lot of details are missing but I think you get the point. Excuse my English, it’s not my native language

2025-09-16 22:27:23

Luca Moretti

Advice

AITA for saying if dad's affair partner needs more help it should come from her kids because I don't care about what happens to her?

I (16m) live with my dad, his affair partner (wife) and her two kids 12 and 8. I have an older sister (19f) who's in college. What happened is four years ago my parents divorced because my mom, sister and I found out my dad was cheating. The affair partner's husband also found out about the affair. My mom and the affair partner's husband divorced their spouses and that left my dad and his affair partner to get married. The affair partner's ex stopped seeing the kids after he found out about the affair. And it's not because they're my dad's. They can't be since the kids are a different race just like their dad. My sister and I turned our backs on dad after we found out about the affair. Dad had been a good dad before the affair but he stopped spending time with us and was always busy with work or "in therapy" outside of work to focus on us and we found out why. My mom got primary custody of us and that was a huge relief. But mom died unexpectedly last year and then I had no other choice but to move in with dad and his affair partner. They tried to convince my sister to move in too but she was going away for college and wanted nothing to do with them. When dad's affair partner tried to suggest she should stay a while my sister told her to die. Then she blocked my dad on her phone and she only talks to me. We talk almost every day. I keep her updated on how awful it is living with them. My dad made me go to therapy with them but the therapist fired us because I wouldn't engage and my dad insisted she find some way to help us. My dad and I argued and I told him I didn't want to try or to make things work. He told me we need to because I can't hide behind my mom anymore. He said he was sorry for upsetting me and my sister but we should try to understand he fell in love. I told him I didn't care and I was only there until I didn't have to be and then I'd do what my sister did. I do have other family but none in the same state and that's a big deal. My grandparents tried to get custody of me but apparently being 16 it doesn't matter because out of state and living parent makes that a huge no. So now my dad and his affair partner are expecting a baby and she's got a bunch of complications. She was sick a lot, bleeding a lot and her blood pressure is really bad apparently. My dad and her wanted me to help her out when I get back from school and help take care of stuff until my dad gets back but I said no and I ignored them. I actually just come home late after school and if she asks me to get her water or whatever when I'm at the house I ignore her. They told me how serious all this stuff is that she could die and the baby could die and I need to help because of how serious this is and whatever. I told them they should ask her kids for help because I don't care what happens to her. I said I don't even want to be here and I never want to be here. I said they were sick and they needed to leave me alone because they weren't making a family out of the mess they created. They went nuts about her kids being younger and how I should care for any human life. AITA?

2025-10-22 08:20:44

Luca Moretti