My girlfriend got pr****nt from som**hing horrible that happened to her. I broke up with her because she wanted to keep the baby.
In the shadow of a silent trauma, a man stands steadfast beside his girlfriend, who has closed herself off from the world after a harrowing event in a park. Her pain is a heavy, unspoken burden, and though she refuses help or answers, he chooses to be her unwavering anchor in the storm of her despair.
Then, amidst the darkness, a new life emerges—a pregnancy shrouded in complexity and impossible paternity. Bound by love, faith, and the weight of impossible choices, they confront a future neither expected, where hope and heartbreak intertwine in a fragile dance.
As renowned family therapist Dr. Virginia Satir states, “The only way to change the way people relate to each other is to change the way they relate to themselves.” This quote highlights the necessity of individual self-awareness and boundary clarity, which appears significantly absent or rigidly applied in this scenario.
This situation involves complex layers of trauma response, religious ethics, and relationship boundaries. The girlfriend's initial shutdown following the park incident is a classic trauma response, making clear decision-making difficult. The OP, while responding initially with support by staying and attending joint therapy, introduced an absolute boundary (the conditionality of the relationship tied to the pregnancy outcome) that superseded existing support structures. This placed the girlfriend in an impossible position: choose between her moral/religious identity and the physical presence of the partner who had supported her through trauma. While the OP has the right to decide if he can parent a child conceived under these circumstances, linking that decision to staying in the relationship effectively weaponized his presence, overriding her need for stability post-trauma.
The OP's action of setting a firm ultimatum was understandable from his perspective regarding parental responsibility, but the execution was destructive given her fragility. In future high-stakes situations involving trauma and reproductive choices, a more constructive approach involves seeking individual counseling for both parties first to process the trauma and conflicting desires separately, before negotiating terms for co-parenting or separation. The recommendation here is that while the OP's boundary regarding fatherhood was firm, linking it so rigidly to the relationship's continuation before the girlfriend had fully processed the trauma and religious implications resulted in unnecessary emotional damage.
THIS STORY SHOOK THE INTERNET – AND REDDITORS DIDN’T HOLD BACK.:
Users didn’t stay quiet — they showed up in full force, mixing support with sharp criticism. From calling out bad behavior to offering real talk, the comments lit up fast.
The original poster (OP) faced an intensely difficult situation involving his girlfriend's trauma, subsequent pregnancy, and conflicting deeply held beliefs. The central conflict arose when the OP made his continued presence conditional upon the girlfriend choosing an abortion, a choice she ultimately could not make due to her religious convictions, leading the OP to end the relationship.
Given the extreme emotional distress and the absolute nature of the OP's ultimatum versus the girlfriend's moral stance on the pregnancy, the core question remains: Was the OP justified in demanding the termination of a pregnancy resulting from assault as a non-negotiable condition for remaining in a supportive relationship, or did this ultimatum constitute an abandonment during her most vulnerable time?
Trending This Week
AITA for canceling stepdaughter's birthday party?
My stepdaughter is turning 18 and lives mostly with her mother. My husband works a lot but is a very involved father. He asked me to plan her birthday party, and I agreed, spending several hundred dollars and many hours of my own time to make sure everything was perfect. The conflict began when the biological mother demanded my husband buy over five thousand dollars in jewelry and concert tickets for their daughter, which we could not afford. When my husband refused, the biological mother drove to our home, stood in our driveway, and began screaming and cursing at him. To defend my husband and our home, I went outside and told her to shut her mouth and that she had no right to speak to him that way. Although my stepdaughter was not present, her mother told her about the confrontation. Consequently, my stepdaughter uninvited me from the party I planned and funded, claiming she and her mother felt too uncomfortable to have me there. In response, I decided to cancel the reservations, catering, and decorations, choosing to redirect my money elsewhere.
AITAH For reclaiming my pregnancy snacks and not telling people about the pregnancy?
I am currently 14 weeks pregnant and have not told many people at work aside from HR, my direct supervisor, and a few close colleagues. It is not widely known that I am pregnant and I have been wearing baggy clothes as I wanted to wait a good amount of time before announcing it. My issue is that I now have limited foods I can eat and keep snacks at my desk so I can nibble throughout the day. I had a bowl of mixed fruit snacks (Welches and Albanese) and recently found out that I cannot eat the Welches because my blood sugar reacts more to them. I had yet to sort out the bowl and left it out for two days on the back of my desk. A coworker walked behind me, assumed I was in a meeting, and started taking them. I felt weird and did not say anything in the moment. I waited until after she left to sort out the fruit snacks and decided to be nice and put out the bowl in a shared area with the Welches since I will not be able to eat them. A week later, a different coworker was complaining loudly by my desk that someone had sorted the fruit snacks and taken all the good ones, leading me to believe multiple people were taking my snacks without asking. I normally keep them in my cabinet but forgot to put them away and was gone the following day. Since I pay for them myself, I am wondering if I overreacted by taking away the fruit snacks I can eat, or if I should stop keeping snacks at my desk entirely.
WIBTA to insist my neighbor keep a yard schedule?
For background I have a severely reactive rescue dog. She's terrified of other dogs and freaks out majorly when she sees them or hears them. My partner and I have been working with our vet and a behavioral trainer and we've made some progress, but my dog is still not truly comfortable anywhere but her own yard. A new lady just moved in next door, and she has two big dogs. They seem like nice dogs, they are quiet and she works with them a lot. The problem is that she works from home full time, and her dogs are always outside. She doesn't leave them there for hours or anything, but I never know when she's going to let them out or for how long. She also spends a lot of time out there with them after work and on weekends. To be fair to her, she trains them and she doesn't let them run up on the fence, and if they do bark, she makes them go inside. They're still out on the other side of the fence though and my dog is now scared and reacting in her own backyard. When my dog starts carrying on, she is the one who has to go inside. She already can't enjoy walks and now she can't even enjoy being outside. I asked my neighbor if she'd consider a schedule for the dogs so that my dog can enjoy her yard too without the neighbor's dogs freaking her out on the other side of the fence. She was polite about it but said no, she bought the house with the yard for her dogs, and they use it. She said she'd be glad to tell me when she's leaving with them for a period of hours, but otherwise she's not going to change what she's doing day to day. So nothing changed and her dogs get plenty of outdoor time and mine gets none except for the stray times when she takes one of her dogs to a training class or takes both of them for a hike. I'm really upset and want to insist that we adopt a schedule so that my dog can have some outside time too. My dog does not get the same opportunity as her dogs, not even close. Her dogs have free access five days a week, weeknights, and weekends. My dog only gets outside time now when she says she is leaving for a class or a hike. If I let my dog out to sun herself at 10:30 on a Tuesday, sure enough, it won't be five minutes before she's letting her dogs out and then my dog freaks out and has to come in. She is not getting anywhere close to what they are getting. The fence is a privacy fence. My dog freaks out when she can hear and smell the other dogs as well as see them. She can't see these dogs but she knows they're there.
