AITA for being mad at my parents because they withheld information about my medical history from me?
For a lifetime, they lived trapped behind a veil of relentless nasal struggles—breathing through the mouth became the only way to survive, while the world of scents and flavors remained an elusive dream. Constantly battling a flood of snot that soaked clothes and bedding, they faced not only physical discomfort but the sting of alienation and ridicule, left lonely and misunderstood with no hope of relief.
Then, in a twist of fate, a move across the country opened a door to healing. Within days of settling into a new home, the impossible happened: they breathed freely through their nose for the first time ever. The flood stopped, senses awakened, and sleep returned—transforming a lifetime of suffering into newfound freedom and hope.
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As renowned developmental psychologist Dr. Gabor Maté explains, “Illness is often a communication from the body that something in one's life is out of balance.” In this case, the OP’s chronic sinus issues served as a physical manifestation of an imbalance created by parental inaction, where convenience dictated the standard of care rather than the child's well-being.
The situation highlights a severe breach of fiduciary duty regarding a child's health. The parents acted as gatekeepers of medical information, making decisions based on their perceived burden ('too much hassle' for medication, 'too much work' for a humidifier) rather than advocating for their child's documented needs. The medical records explicitly indicated that the dry climate exacerbated the condition and offered actionable, non-invasive solutions like medication and environmental control. Withholding this information, especially when the child was actively ridiculed and suffered socially due to the symptoms, demonstrates a failure in parental responsibility and emotional support.
The parents' subsequent reaction—accusing the OP of snooping and reiterating that they were right to withhold the 'cure'—is a classic deflection tactic to avoid accountability for past negligence. The OP’s anger is entirely warranted, as this discovery invalidates years of perceived helplessness. To handle similar situations, the OP should prioritize clear, factual communication regarding the impact of past omissions, setting firm boundaries against gaslighting, and focusing on current health management rather than trying to force an apology for past choices.
HERE’S HOW REDDIT BLEW UP AFTER HEARING THIS – PEOPLE COULDN’T BELIEVE IT.:
It didn’t take long before the comment section turned into a battleground of strong opinions and even stronger emotions.
The original poster (OP) is deeply upset because they discovered their parents actively withheld information about treatable chronic sinus issues, prioritizing convenience over the OP's lifelong physical comfort and health. The central conflict lies between the OP's justifiable anger over years of unnecessary suffering and the parents' defensive reaction, which frames the OP's attempt to access private medical history as an invasion of privacy and dismisses the severity of the past condition.
Given the parents' justification that treatment involved too much hassle, was the OP justified in being furious about discovering that a simple change in environment or routine medication could have prevented decades of chronic breathing difficulties, or did the parents have the right to manage medical decisions without full disclosure to their child?